Wednesday, June 17, 2009

It's Only Beginning to Find Release

I'm tired of listening to Mormons talk about the divine "One Man, One Woman" only definition of marriage. I might punch the next person I hear spouting this hypocrisy. Wasn't that one of the roles of Jesus? "[F]eeding the hungry, healing the sick, rebuking hypocrisy, pleading for faith — this was Christ showing us the way of the Father," said Elder Jeffrey R. Holland. That's right. Rebuking hypocrisy was not only one of the roles of Jesus, it is the way of God.

Well, I'm gonna play God here and rebuke some hypocrisy.

Do any of these arguments sound familiar? (Maybe you read them here, here, or here) Have you ever heard a Mormon say something like . . .
  • Same Sex Marriage is wrong because marriage has always been between one man and one woman.
  • Same Sex Marriage will bring upon our society all the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets.
  • Homosexuality was part of the fall of the Roman Empire. This social experiment to redefine marriage will be the end of America.
  • Homosexuality denigrates the family. Same Sex Marriage is an affront to morality and traditional values.
  • Homosexuality leads to the spread of diseases like AIDS. It spreads all sorts of filth like pornography, prostitution, fornication, and promiscuity.
  • Same Sex Marriage is a recent union created to justify immoral men's desires.
  • Homosexuals who flaunt their lifestyle ought to be ashamed of their weakness.
Well, those arguments should sound familiar, because the Mormons have used them before--when fighting the evils of monogamy. (You know, one man and one woman). The exact same arguments used to defend the only acceptable definition of marriage as one man and one woman were once used by Latter-day Saint Prophets to fight that very definition.
  • "It is a fact worthy of note that the shortest lived nations of which we have record have been monogamic. Rome...was a monogamic nation and the numerous evils attending that system early laid the foundation for that ruin which eventually overtook her."
    Apostle George Q. Cannon, Journal of Discourses, Vol. 13, p. 202
  • "Since the founding of the Roman empire monogamy has prevailed more extensively than in times previous to that. The founders of that ancient empire were robbers and women stealers, and made laws favoring monogamy in consequence of the scarcity of women among them, and hence this monogamic system which now prevails throughout Christendom, and which had been so fruitful a source of prostitution and whoredom throughout all the Christian monogamic cities of the Old and New World, until rottenness and decay are at the root of their institutions both national and religious."
    The Prophet Brigham Young Journal of Discourses, Vol. 11, p. 128
  • "...the one-wife system not only degenerates the human family, both physically and intellectually, but it is entirely incompatible with philosophical notions of immortality; it is a lure to temptation, and has always proved a curse to a people."
    Prophet John Taylor, Millennial Star, Vol. 15, p. 227
  • "Monogamy, or restrictions by law to one wife, is no part of the economy of heaven among men. Such a system was commenced by the founders of the Roman empire....Rome became the mistress of the world, and introduced this order of monogamy wherever her sway was acknowledged. Thus this monogamic order of marriage, so esteemed by modern Christians as a holy sacrament and divine institution, is nothing but a system established by a set of robbers.... Why do we believe in and practice polygamy? Because the Lord introduced it to his servants in a revelation given to Joseph Smith, and the Lord's servants have always practiced it. 'And is that religion popular in heaven?' it is the only popular religion there,..."
    The Prophet Brigham Young, The Deseret News, August 6, 1862
  • "This law of monogamy, or the monogamic system, laid the foundation for prostitution and the evils and diseases of the most revolting nature and character under which modern Christendom groans,..."
    Apostle Orson Pratt, Journal of Discourses, Vol. 13, page 195
  • "We breathe the free air, we have the best looking men and handsomest women, and if they [Non-Mormons] envy us our position, well they may, for they are a poor, narrow-minded, pinch-backed race of men, who chain themselves down to the law of monogamy, and live all their days under the dominion of one wife. They ought to be ashamed of such conduct, and the still fouler channel which flows from their practices; and it is not to be wondered at that they should envy those who so much better understand the social relations."
    Apostle George A Smith, Journal of Discourses, Vol. 3, page 291
  • "I have noticed that a man who has but one wife, and is inclined to that doctrine, soon begins to wither and dry up, while a man who goes into plurality [of wives] looks fresh, young, and sprightly. Why is this? Because God loves that man, and because he honors his word. Some of you may not believe this, but I not only believe it but I also know it. For a man of God to be confined to one woman is small business. I do not know what we would do if we had only one wife apiece."
    Apostle Heber C. Kimball, Journal of Discourses Vol 5, page 22
  • "Just ask yourselves, historians, when was monogamy introduced on to the face of the earth? When those buccaneers, who settled on the peninsula where Rome now stands, could not steal women enough to have two or three apiece, they passed a law that a man should have but one woman. And this started monogamy and the downfall of the plurality system. In the days of Jesus, Rome, having dominion over Jerusalem, they carried out the doctrine more or less. This was the rise, start and foundation of the doctrine of monogamy; and never till then was there a law passed, that we have any knowledge of, that a man should have but one wife. "
    The Prophet Brigham Young, Journal of Discourses Vol. 12, page 262
To my knowledge, changing the definition of marriage from one man and several woman to one man and one woman did not bring the downfall of Utah, or of the United States. It did not destroy the family as an institution. Changing it again to be inclusive of all families is not going to hurt Latter-day Saints any more than monogamy did. Allowing other Americans to live the lifestyle of their choice and have their families protected by the government will not hurt society! And if the Mormons want to jump on the bandwagon and join in, great! It might take a generation, and it might cause a splinter group, but I'm sure we can bury all the homophobic publications under the rug and start over with a new revelation broadening marriage once again.

Sorry for the rant. I realize I'm not the first to make these connections and accusations. I just wanted to be in on the rebuking fun. Don't blame me, I learned it from Jesus.

12 comments:

Alan said...

Classic, Dan. Well done.

D-Train said...

Oh my gosh. I heart you so much for this post.

austin said...

The charge of hypocrisy due to our polygamous history has been made before, of course, but I hadn't ever seen quotes from church leaders decrying monogamy in the same terms they now denounce gay marriage. Wonderful find.

Max Power said...

*clap clap clap*

Max Power said...

FYI: References of the page numbers need a few corrections if you are looking at the electronic version of JoD on journalofdiscourses.org:

1) page 239
2) page 150
3) not JoD
4) not JoD
5) page 230
6) page 391
7) page 33
8) pages 296-297

Ezra said...

This post is possibly the greatest and funniest thing that I've ever read.

The sad thing is, if I still had a testimony of the LDS church, I'd probably just use that lame excuse of "modern revelation" to protect my ignorance.

drakames said...

Wow, I had no idea about those arguments from past leaders of the Church. Thanks for this! Brilliant!

Joe Conflict said...

This is so good. Interesting, fascinating, and demonstrating a complete ignorance of church leaders on what reality in the next life really is all about.

Joe Conflict said...

So how does one get invited to view the other blog?

Daniel said...

This video seems like a relavant thing to post on this thread.

Betty Bowers Explains Traditional Marriage to Everyone Else

Alan said...

I saw this video Daniel, it is screamingly funny.

Anonymous said...

excellent writing .